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The Road To Confidence

9/5/2018

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Do you ever struggle with confidence in what you are doing in your business or life?  
This is my summary and interpretation of Confidence 101 a MentorBox lecture by Jonathon Kendall.

Confidence is living by how you see and judge yourself, rather than how others see you. According to Confidence 101 a MentorBox lecture by Jonathon Kendall, there are four easy steps to achieving a confident and ultimately a successful life.

First of all, you need to acquire a sense of self-compassion. Self-compassion is the act of forgiving yourself for any possible outcome that is not desired, rather than throwing yourself under the bus, before anything has even happened. Many people have said that "the battle was lost before it had begun" and this is true in many situations. Relating to an event, it is often true that before the event has even started, people have already decided their fate, that they will fail, and so they do. Self-Compassion makes this impossible, as it is the forgiveness of yourself before any of that ever happens. This means that there is no more such thing as "failing", and now there is only something to be gained, either you will succeed, or you will better yourself and learn from it. This effectively eliminates a lack of confidence because you know that no matter what, there is only an upside.

The second step to becoming a confident person, is to prepare yourself. If you work, day in and day out on something, than you are eventually going to become an expert at it , and therefore confident in it. Something that you practice your whole life is something that you will be good at, and so preparation will leave you with confidence in yourself to complete a task within that range of skills and activities at a high standard. 

The third step is to give yourself somewhat of a confidence bubble or force field that allows you to block out all negative comments and concerns. This bubble keeps you focused on you and not focused on what other people think of you. Often people allow others to negatively impact their confidence and their view of themselves. This bubble that is sometimes a little bit of an ego, reflects all negative opinions, and only concerns itself with those that will make the person better as a whole, not worse. To take it even further, this bubble should be surrounded by positive influences, and that comes down to the decisions we make concerning the people that we surround ourselves with. The goal, no matter how hard, is to eliminate those who degrade us as an overall human being, and draw closer those who improve us.

The fourth and final step to living a confident life, is to build yourself up, using previous experiences and events to build confidence just before an event. Right before an event, there is a sense of extreme anxiety and nervousness that comes over you, making everything else that has led up to this event pointless. During this time, it is important to not try and avoid these feelings, but rather try and redirect them into something positive. You can think about previous positive experiences to lift you up, use music to hype you up, or do other activities that you enjoy that are exciting and confidence boosting to you. Getting "psyched up" as they called it, is necessary to getting good results, as right before an event, in a time of need, you have to rise up towards success.

As much as confidence is a very useful thing, the last thing that I gathered from this lecture was that it is important to draw the line between confident, and overconfident. Overconfidence leads to failure, as you may not worry enough or stress enough on the preparation that is required for good results.Confidence isn't about walking around like you are the best in the world, or showing everyone else that you are better than them, it's all about how you feel inside, whether or not you are meeting your own standards on a daily basis.

​Reference - mentorbox.com
Review Summary credit -  Jake Flothe

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